Surviving Toxic Leaders

Some months back, I came across Jean Blumen's book 'The Allure of Toxic Leaders'. In my browsing, she did a great job highlighting how and why people consistently (persistently) allow the rise of leaders of dubious morality, with charisma akin to that of Sith Lord/Emperor Palpatine of Star Wars fame, who manipulate and exploit the weaknesses of those who are around them. In Blumen's analysis, she identified individuals like the recently-deceased Kenneth Lay (of Enron infamy), Adolph Hitler as examples of toxic leaders.

I've had the opportunity to encounter with one such toxic leader over the past 1 year (certainly not one too few) in a community body that I was volunteering with. This person was distinctly a maverick, riding roughshod over the volunteers, who through their financial support, were paying his salary. His constituents, however, saw in him, the charismatic answer to all that was apparently wrong with the 'system'. To cut a long story short, he 'bit the hand that fed him', by taking about 80% of the constituents under him to join another organisation, without remorse, I might add.

The effects of serving under toxic leaders are immediately recognisable. The more important considerations is how to survive under them. Blumen suggests 3 key ways and we add a few more of our own.

Blumen proposes that:

• there is safety in numbers - count the costs of confronting such a leader. If you're not prepared for 'professional hara kiri', bide your time
• we should hold them accountable - where possible, document their decisions in black-and-white
• controlling oneself ie don't turn toxic yourself in the process

We believe that the Asian context, where 'group mentality' establishes the primacy of group norms over individualism, probably sees more people working and suffering under these toxic leaders in silence. Just 2 weeks ago, I was told by a friend about his ex-boss who would consistently zero in on a few individuals each year for 'special treatment'. Some coped so badly that they needed to seek 'psychiatric help'!

We suggest a few additional measures that should be considered:

• Gain clarity about what's fundamentally important to you - is it holding true to one's values or the security of a well-paying job? Tough situations create opportunities for seeking clarity and once that is gained, then strategies and plans can be made to align to mental perspective. Even if you are choosing the lesser of evils eg staying on in the job is not an option, then at least you would have gotten the resolve to see the situation through.
• Confide in someone who can lend a listening ear - Remember, a burden shared is a burden halved. Knowing that we are not alone in the situation does go a long way. However, it's also important to keep some perspective and not allow your sharings to become so malice-laden that you become toxic too.
• Have a sense of humour - Looking at a dark situation with humour can create a healthy 'distraction' from the trouble at work. You could also benefit from ther perspective-taking too, as you look for the funny moments in those dark situations. When humour and optimism develop, resilience is the result.
• Reflect and think about how this experience can make you into a better colleague and team leader, especially when you get into a new job setting. Learning about your own threshold, clarifying your values and goals are some opportunities that would lead to personal growth, even as you work under toxic leaders.
• Develop Plan B - Well, when push comes to shove, there's never any harm in updating that resume and being on the lookout for an alternative. You never know when an opportunity might knock, so it's good to get prepared.

Noel Tan

Resident Philosopher

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